I can’t believe it has been almost 6 weeks since miss Maya entered our lives.
You think life is busy …and then you have a baby … then you have another one and you blink and the days and weeks are gone. So here we are 6 weeks later. Life is crazy beautiful. Some days are chaotic and some like today run smooth as silk (it is only 12pm though) 😂
Thought I’d share a little on how life has changed and things I’ve come to realise since becoming a Mum second time around. The raw honest truth!
From day one Miss Maya has been a little dream baby. So chilled so easy !? Although I’m sure it has a lot to do with her it also has a lot to do with me. I actually thought I was pretty chilled first time around but now I can reflect and see that I wasn’t. I put a lot of pressure on myself and becoming a Mum for the first time comes with a lot of stress of the unknown so things ‘seem harder’. Second time over you know (somewhat lol) what your doing you feel more at ease within yourself and you trust YOUR mama instinct and you just get on with it.
I remember Aria was such a routine baby because it was just us (her and I) everyday we just made our own routine and we worked around that. To be honest I stayed completely in my bubble and didn’t venture far from home on my own not for a while anyway.
Miss Maya on the other hand just goes with the flow. .. she has too. She sleeps on the go and surrounded by the noise of the house and just slots into our life like she’s always been there. She’s actually a very sleepy baby 🙌🏻 i didn’t know what that was until now so it’s definitely helped with the transition from one to two.
I’m not worried about every little thing … I don’t have time lol
I love how my parenting style has changed and evolved. I do things ‘my’ way not the way ‘they tell you you should’. They being the experts, the books, the blogs, the other mums.
We have had our fair share of hard times over the past 6 weeks. My heart strings have been pulled further then I thought possible in both directions. I don’t know what I was expecting bringing baby number 2 home but I certainly wasn’t prepared for how hard the change for Aria would be initially . How she at times would push the limits with her behaviour and how thin my patience would be due to lack of sleep and me adjusting too. Those first 2 weeks were tough. They were filled with so many beautiful heart warming moments but they were tough. I was hormonal, tired and we were all adjusting. It wasn’t easy but we did it. Some days I was impressed with myself (with us) and others I wondered how I would do this.
So here is what I’ve learned and what I’d tell any mums preparing to bring home another Bub or even baby number one.
– Except all and any help that is offered. Even the smallest of gestures. I’ve been absolutely blessed and had Shaun’s Mum here for week one. I was able to rest. She helped with everything around the house and just took that stress away from our first week home. So grateful! I’ve had friends bring me coffee, cooked meals (way better then mine 🙌🏻), helped me to the car, held the baby while I ate (critical lol) and they have just been there and checked in to say ‘hey ! How are you !? … to those friends thank you ! I Love you oh so much. Those little things make all the difference.
– Say NO … to anything you don’t feel up too. Yes you are allowed to say NO! To visitors, to housework to schedules. It’s important not to overload yourself. Even if you have to cancel a visit from friends or family or say No to a trip to the shops because at that moment it seems to hard. If your tired and just need to get through the day that’s OK!
– You do not get as much one on one time with baby number two (I found this hard at first). You have to make the moments count and treasure them. You also don’t get the same one on one time with your first babe as often (I also struggled with this). Again you need to make the time where you can. Put things on hold for them. You can’t get the time back 💕 This does leave your daily personal space limit maxed out all day everyday but finding ways to balance some one on one time with both babes helps everyone. Even if it’s just a shower or quick trip to the shops with your toddler while your newbie is asleep, it reminds them they are still special too. It gets easier and then it’s the new normal.
– Give yourself a break! You are superwoman but you can NOT do it all everyday and that’s ok! There will be days where 2 min noodles or eggs on toast is what’s for dinner because your day has been crazy, your tired and anything will do. There is always tomorrow!
– Back to the personal space thing. Everything is different this time. Breastfeeding whilst your toddler tries climbing over your head. Showering with one while one cries or vice versa lol sometimes it’s crazy. Going to the bathroom with two sets of eyes on you ( one probably climbing on you) but just like you did the first time you find a way and make it work. Some days won’t go to plan and that’s okay ! A quick trip to the shops…. yeh what is that anymore haha everything is a mission haha but the best way to get used to it is to get out there…. when your ready of course.
– give yourself a realistic amount of time to adjust. It takes time 🙂 same goes for the whole family. It’s not meant to be all smooth sailing and perfect. That’s parenting and life in general. Take your time.
– your allowed to have good days, bad days and everything in between. It’s normal! Feel all the feels and remember your not alone in your thoughts. Talk to your partner, your friends and your support network (big or small) ✨
– everything is just as amazing and wonderful the second time around. All the firsts are still firsts with your second and watching them grow and develop brings so much happiness to the whole family including your toddler. I know with Aria she is particularly loving things as Maya is becoming more interactive and babbles and looks at her and smiles she just loves that.
– seeing your two little babes together is simply the best thing in the world and watching your hubby/ partner naturally step up and help with the juggle is great too. I’ve also loved how Shaun and Arias bond has grown even stronger too.
– you get twice the hugs and kisses and all the good stuff 💕 your heart will never have been so full !
– you have the best job in the world 💗
So yes we have survived the first 6 weeks and are loving life as a family of four. We still have many challenges ahead and will make it work….. all together. Again this isn’t advice or tips from an expert I’m just a mum who’s trying to do her very best and learning along the way.